Things to do on a friday night when you’re broke, alone and have no plans.

Yep, it’s gonna happen. Soon, you’ll have to lie when people asked you what you did this weekend because you’re lowkey still tryna impress them. Also, making friends is hard when ya need to balance it out with that 8-5 job and you’ve only ever committed yourself to binge-watching Netflix.

  • Throw out all the clothes from your closet onto your bed with the intention of reorganising your closet.
  • Get tired halfway through because it’s a fucking magical neverending heap of clothes.
  • Ignore pile on bed. Make a lil space to lie down between clothes.
  • Watch netflix
  • Drink a glass of sherry by yourself.
  • Watch netflix slightly tipsy.
  • Paint on old newspaper because you can’t find any paper.
  • Watch videos on how to make origami.
  • Make an origami box.
  • Make an origami crane.
  • Put origami crane in origami box.
  • Make an overly sexual Snapchat video of yourself trying too hard.
  • Watch it and delete it.
  • Stalk strangers on Instagram.
  • Think about colouring your hair or getting an edgy haircut.
  • Look at stomach in mirror.
  • Text Mom
  • Mom replies that shes busy – she’s hanging out with friends and it’s friday night; get a life
  • Go through every single facebook message you ever sent
  • Think of sassy replies and wonder why the hell younger you didn’t have more balls.
  • Listen to music.
  • Find a song with lyrics that relate so you force some #feels
  • Write a blogpost.
  • Never spell check anything again cause GURL look at dis blogpost.
  • Find actual alive cricket’s in your room.
  • Shoo them out with phone flashlight, deoderant and lost of panicky squeels.
  • Accept defeat
  • Sleep.
  • Wake up and see friends still having fun without you
  • go back to sleep

The eeeeeend.



A writer with nothing to say.

I was in love with you, Writing. How embarrassing, admitting that we are strangers again. How embarrassing to admit that the way I boasted about you in public, the way I flaunted our intimacy to others – has come to this.

Crumpled up papers. Nothing.

We were lovers once and passionate words burnt in my throat like the hand rolled cigarettes I smoke to avoid you now. Like a passive aggressive teenager, I’ll avoid you when we walk pass each other in the street. I refuse to make eye contact, and when a close friend asks how you are doing, I avoid the question as if we never knew each other.

Continue reading

A Step by Step Guide on Hitting Rock Bottom.

Guess what folks, everyone kinda feels like they don’t have any idea what they’re doing. In recent times of melodrama and existential crisis’s, I have decided to channel my inner Hannah Horvath from ‘Girls’.

A Total Fuck up (1)

I hear her unstable voice in the back of mind saying “I have work, then a dinner thing and then I am busy trying to figure out who I am”.

So – in an attempt to not sound like I am a mess of bad excuses here is a foolproof  guide to feeling a little bit better about where you’re at in life.

Continue reading

Thanks Brain, you’re a dick.

The great thing about growing up is discovering all these different parts of yourself. I mean, basically any coming-of-age movie makes it clear that we’re all trying to ‘find ourselves’.

*spoiler – They find themselves.

*plot twist – I’ve never been very good at hide and seek.

So, whilst moving from one existential crisis to the next, we get to know ourselves, right? We start becoming familiar with our self in relation to the space we find ourselves in. The shitty thing is though – not all of our parts are nice. Not all of them want to be found, and quite frankly, I wouldn’t mind not-looking for them either.

One of the little discoveries I have recently made is the ease in which I fall into self-doubt. This little bugger, however, is not shy at all and it was never lost. It knows exactly where it can and can’t go and just does what it likes anyway. I never went looking for it, it’s just been around.

Now that I have (or at least tried) to acknowledge my little partner in crime, I am trying to distinguish between my actual flaws and the blatant lies my brain tells my body.

The most recent lie in the saga of my mind has been the reoccurring theme that, no one likes me, no one loves me, no one will come when I need them and as soon as I leave the room there is a basic unanimous sigh of relief from the universe in general that I am no longer paining anyone with my presence. Melodramatic, I know, but bare with me.

We start believing it, and as soon as it’s stuck, Mr. self-doubt feeds on everything and anything it sees. We start perpetuating it in the things around us.

*CUE THOUGHT* – “It’s been like 2hours, why hasn’t he/she replied, I probably did something dumb again, why are they mad, are they okay?” –

and then there’s the reality that they’re probably just busy dude. Chill.

Second-guessing and doubt will get you absolutely nowhere when it comes to the things you can’t control or the people around you. Also, I am pretty darn sure that if someone loves you – the petty things you worry about is not enough to make them up and leave.

Therefore, in order to keep my sanity – I am starting to be as kind to myself as I try to be to others. You are human, You are trying your best, you’re growing and constantly creating yourself. Breathe a bit and let the people around you prove the poo part of your brain wrong as much as they can – and people will, I promise.